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Sitting across from retired First Sergeant Reginald Adams, I couldn't help but feel the weight of his 27 years of service, a testament to the discipline and resilience he carried throughout his military career. Our conversation, rich with personal stories and laughter, takes you on a journey through Reginald's life—highlighting how his steadfast faith was both his armor and compass. From an unexpected enlistment to the trials of leadership and the challenge of maintaining a sober lifestyle amid chaos, Reginald's narrative is a beacon for those looking to find balance and strength in their own lives.
We then traverse the landscapes of mental fortitude and post-service realities, mapping out the terrain of a Christian veteran of color. Reginald and I tackle the tough topics, from the stark contrast of societal grievances to the physical training that became our sanctuary during deployment. The weight room stories serve as both metaphor and memory, marking the growth and camaraderie developed under the harshest conditions. These are the moments that shape a soldier, and we hope they resonate with any listener seeking to understand the complexity of identity and resilience.
As our discussion weaves into the evolution of behavioral health support for veterans, we highlight the vital transition programs and the introduction of whole health coaches that aid our brothers and sisters in arms as they reintegrate into civilian life. We laugh and reflect on the curious world of social media influencers, pondering the impact of their content on society while also appreciating the poignant connections they can create. Our heartfelt episode concludes with a reminder of the fragility of life and the profound role of spirituality, leaving you, dear listener, with a sense of hope and a call to embrace your own spiritual path.
00:07 - Christian Veterans Podcast With Sgt. Adams
11:21 - Faith and Promotion in the Military
24:44 - Maintaining Faith Through Life's Challenges
36:45 - Challenges and Growth After Military Service
44:28 - Military Transition and Mental Health Challenges
52:04 - Influencers and Social Media Impact
01:00:58 - Brotherly Farewell and Blessings
27 years active duty army, retired first sergeant Reginald Adams, are you ready, ready?
Urban Christian Veterans provides a safe place for Christian veterans of color to discuss the challenges you face in your daily lives. Being a person of color has its challenges. Being a veteran has its challenges. All of those factors being combined makes for a unique and sometimes difficult life experience that is seldom talked about in public forums. Thank you for tuning in to the Urban Christian Veterans Podcast. Here's your host, D'Alan Rose.
Thank you, erin, for that wonderful introduction. This is D'Alan Rose and you are listening to the Urban Christian Veterans Podcast. Okay, man, first of all, thank you so much for taking the time to chat with me today. I really appreciate it, man. I know you're a busy man, being all retired and whatnot, so I appreciate that, man, thank you, thank you.
Thank you so much for joining me, no problem, no problem, it's thanks for you, bro, it's thanks for you, man.
I appreciate that. Listen, I think we go back what 30, some odd years.
Easy.
Yes, definitely. So. You know, technically I have known you more than half my life, man. That's why I'm Wow.
Right, wow, so yeah.
Yeah, we go back 30 some odd years. I think you met back in. What was it 90?, 89?
Yes, 90, something like that yeah, definitely. In the 89 beginning of the 90,.
Saudi Arabia. Yeah, yeah, so yeah, we go way back, man.
That said, if you could tell the audience a little bit about yourself, Real, simple Country boy raising a little town, dade City, florida, 40 minutes north of Tampa, like we had three stop lights, you know that small oh wow. My mom got remarried, moved to Tampa. So of course I told everybody I was from Tampa. Okay, so I was a little country boy, you know moved to the big city from Tampa. I joined the After I graduated high school, joined the military that's what we met actually for Benning, georgia. And then from there everything took off like a rocket ship. Had no intentions on really joining the military. I really did. I would have bet money that I wasn't going to join the military. The recruiter wore me down. I just went in there just to see.
Right.
And they got me. That's all I can say. They got me.
They got us both. They got us both Definitely.
You know, 27 years flew by. Actually. It really really did Flew by the grace of God. You know I got out of there all my fingers and toes. You know I've been through everything, got the t-shirt and the hat. You know, jumped out of airplanes, loved that part, that was awesome. Met some good people and still in communication with those few rare folks, got closer to God. Definitely because that'll do it, war will do that, but I stayed. That's the best part about it. I stayed close to God Right on. So, yeah, but pretty much, man, that was it.
Just doing it. I tell you, man, I think back when we used to hang out back in the day, 30-something years ago, I can relate to the whole. I can't see myself doing this. And you know, one thing I will say about you, brother, is that even from back then I could always tell there was something about you, man. You always had that First of all. The proof is in the pudding. You may first, sergeant, that's the proof right there. I told you off camera that I would have never doubted you right now.
And back then how could I put it? Things were a little wild. I'll put it that way Things were a little wild.
That's a good phrase right there, we're going to leave it right there, yeah we're going to leave it there.
But even in all the wildness, what I can truly say about you, brother, is that the wild individuals that we were around, of all of the wild individuals that we were around and as I say that you probably can picture some faces, but I won't bring up any names but, given all the wild individuals that we were around, you always stood out to me as a little different.
And I think that that is why I gravitated towards you A little different, able to navigate the wild waters and still keep yourself on point. So I, you know, I give it up to you, brother, you really you, really you proved it.
Came a first Sergeant. Yeah, I tell everybody that I'm a white whale Right on Because I have never drank and I have never smoked Right, never. And I'm not a person who used to do it and stopped. I never have. And people can't believe that it was like how you, how you, you know, go through the military. I said I just it just never interests me. I had some traumatic experiences that made me not smoke and not drink, right, that's a story. Those are the stories we can and can't Don't have to get into.
But, it's on you.
Man, my mom smoked my entire childhood.
Okay.
And she used to leave like smokers do, they leave the cigarette on the sink with the ashes facing in. And she was on the porch talking to my grandmother and she was like, hey, go on in and give me my cigarette. Well, that was around the time those, the bubblegum cigarettes, came out with the power. Oh yeah, yeah. And you just blow and the smoke come out. Right, I thought that was so cool. So when my mom asked me to go get the cigarette, I went in and got the cigarette. I brought it to her, but I thought am I adolescent, stupid mind that I'm going to take a drag of her cigarette, keep it in my jaws? And when I handed her her cigarette, I would blow the smoke out and she would think it was as cool as I thought it was going to be. Needless to say, that's the day I found out that my mom was a ninja Right.
Because, when I handed her that cigarette, she grabbed it with her right hand, saw the smoke over her right shoulder, she transitioned that cigarette to the left hand and gave me the most severest back hand to my lips. That was so flawless. She was like wow, I slid across that porch and that was it, brother. I never touched another cigarette and I was like that was it.
I did it for me, I did it for me, I did it for me, never touching up, don't even like the smell, cause that's trauma, that's traumatic to me. Wow, my lips they're hurting right now. They're hurting right now. I'm telling you. But yeah, we were, we was a while, it was a while back in the day and I was able to with that and then I was really, truly. I'm one of the church kids. I was raised in the church, church of God and Christ. My grandmother was a trustee, was in the light and the kerosene heater and when it's cold and let everybody else come into the warm church. And I was shaking like a shaking like a stripper and freezing, but grew up in the church, so they kind of definitely followed me.
That's awesome.
The alcohol was the same way I did. Some stupid drunk some hot beer, thinking I'm big Cause. My cousins were the same age I was like 10. Their mother used to allow them to take a sip of their drink.
Everybody in the South. Everybody had one of those aunts. Let they hit, take a sip, get out of here. I thought it was cool, put a hot beer on their sink. About 10 in the morning, about four in the afternoon, I came back. I'm looking in the mirror like man. I'm a man. I pop this hot Budweiser Florida heat hot Budweiser.
It's been there since 10 in the morning so I'll give you a visual. I took a. I took a swig. The most God awful is tasting this thing I've ever tasted in my life. I spit it all in the sink, poured it all out. It was a wrap. I was like never, that's it. I don't even every time I smell beer. Oh yeah, but that was it. But that's why I always stood out, because I was guilty by association. So people thought I was.
They thought I was out there but, you know, just hanging out, and I was designated driver, you know. So everybody could be buck wild and I was cool Right.
I can relate because I'm the same way Never smoke, never drink.
That's exactly why we gravitated to each other. There you go.
And what's funny is, to this day, man, I tell people that I was in the military don't smoke, don't drink, never have. And I tell them some of the places I've been. How'd you go to Korea and not Exactly. How'd you go to Germany and not? Like you? I had some early childhood trauma that made me leave it alone, but we're not going to get into that today.
There you go, maybe another day.
Another day.
Okay, that's awesome. No-transcript Is that McDeal right now?
Wow, okay, air.
Force Air Force.
Smart. He's a smart young man smart don't you?
Yeah, he did the thing, I didn't. He went to the Air Force. But right on, I tell him he's smart but they solved. But anyway, the fact that you couldn't saw yourself joining and I know you said that you did just because to see how it was, but something must have made you stay Like what was the reasoning behind Child?
support. That'll do it every time. Child support yes sir.
Child support.
Yes, sir, I'm keeping it at 100.
Yeah.
I had that child support hit and I was like I was going to get out like everybody, because you know most of our buddies did the first four and got out. Right and a majority of everybody moved to Atlanta and which majority of everybody's still over there too.
So I was going to do it too. I had to seriously sit down with myself and was like listen, you don't have a college degree, you don't have any discernible skills. This got to be it for right now, because this is what was paying the child support. I couldn't even imagine getting out as a 21-year-old 22-year-old without a college degree, trying to go get a job and still had to pay that amount of child support. So that was it. I had no other reason. I had a roof over my head, food and the child support was getting paid.
And in the midst of that I got married a few times, had more kids and stuff like that, and then I drank the Kool-Aid somewhere along year 13. I just went on ahead and was like you know what? This is what you're going to be doing. So I buckled down and I maintained the same MOS. A lot of us reclassed to easier promotable MOSes, but I maintained it. I was a generator guy. I stayed a generator, probably the last first sergeant generator mechanic anybody will ever see Because our promotions was just that bad.
but I fought, fought, fought, prayed, prayed, prayed. I got the right job. And, man, it just kept building and building and building it. And I was frustrated, very frustrated, because I would do the job of the rank above me but I wasn't getting paid and I'm like, hey, I'm doing this job, I'm not getting paid for it. So I had a year, I don't know 19. I'm like, okay, this is ridiculous.
Year 19,. I had a conversation with my then ex and I was like, hey, I'm starting to feel unappreciated. I'm meeting all the rungs on my promotional ladder and I'm still not getting promoted. So that was year 19. At that time you were indefinite. After 16. Year 16, you become indefinite, so it's up to the Army to put you out. So then, after that conversation with her, it clicked and I was like, oh, okay, God, so this is how it was going to be. I got to do the job first and then get promoted. Okay. So when I gave in to that, everything just start just taking off, because I was the acting first sergeant about eight times and you know, the first one had to go and leave, or the first one had to go to a conference or he was doing something else. And hey man, can you sit in? Hey man, can you sit in. Hey man, can you sit in?
I was like okay, I'm gonna eat seven. And I'm like okay, well, what that did was it allowed me to make all the mistakes and the blunders, and the bumps and the bruises.
Right.
And I wasn't getting penalized for it. They were kind of treating me like the little brothers. They say okay, man, the next time this happens, do this the next time that happens, do that. Well, doing that enough times, I learned how to be a first sergeant.
And when I actually pinned on the diamond I was golden. I'm in HHC, 18th Airborne Corps, fort Bragg, the largest, one of the largest corps in the Army. I had no idea, had no idea the magnitude of 18th Airborne Corps until I was up there. So the post commander for Fort Bragg I was his first sergeant. The post sergeant major for Fort Bragg, north Carolina, I was his first sergeant there you go.
And I'm like wow. And then later in that journey, sergeant Major pulled me to the side. It was like you know, this is a senior first sergeant position. You do know that right? And I was like no, I had no idea. They said because when the Sergeant Major is out, the HHC first sergeant sits in for him. Well, they didn't let me do that, I was too green. They just the guy who should have been the HHC first sergeant. I was cool with it. He kind of stepped in when the first sergeant, sergeant Major, had to leave.
But they all told me there's like, man, we commend you on the job that you were doing, because basically I was a green first sergeant and I was like but God, when I accepted that this was what God had for me to do, I have to do the job first and then get promoted to it, you know, get the money. Basically, when I accepted that, my stress level went down. I started having fun Instead of worrying about money, money, money, money. All my peers, of course, they all had been first sergeant majors years ago before me and I'm watching all of them just rise through the ranks. What God did was like just hold on, relax, and I did so when I got pinned first sergeant because I had been in so long. The pay gap between me and them was ridiculous.
I made way more money than them at the rank when they had been a first sergeant all them years or whatever. So, full circle, it came back around and my pay was gigantic compared to my peers and they were like, whoa, I was balling. That's what I was going to say.
Well, you know it's money man, because I've always, always, always heard this saying that says do more than what you get paid for and eventually you will get paid for more than what you do.
That is the truth. I need to write that down. You lived it yeah, yeah.
Yeah, and the thing is, we've progressed, and throughout my career I'm noticed that to be true as well, and it's counterintuitive, right, like why should I do this job? I'm not paying me for it, I don't get paid enough for it, blah blah blah whatever, but it works.
I don't know. I don't know why. It's just one of those things that's awesome, man, that's awesome. And again, I never, I would have never doubted it. You always had that potential. So if you had it to do over again, you had a chance to just rewind and do it again, would you?
I would. I would Two reasons. Well, no, the number one thing is I retired at 40, 46.
Okay.
So I retired at 46. And then I was able to be retired. I didn't do anything right. I didn't save, I didn't do the military's version of the 401. I didn't do anything right.
Okay, so I was in all the most horrible places bombs bursting in air, all of that, all of that and through that I maintain my faith, which actually got me through that. Because that's how God works he wants to break you down to the lowest level, to where nobody but Him gets the credit for your come up. You can't blame yourself, I mean, you can't pride yourself. You can't say, oh, did this guy help me? He took me down to the lowest level, literally. Bombs bursting in air and around you, seeing people get killed and knowing people who got killed and shooting folks and stuff, and nobody can help you. Mama can't help you, daddy can't get you, nobody can't be on the phone and say you can leave Afghanistan. Now, you know, when I was down like that and in the dirt and I literally that's my favorite Bible verse I literally was walking in the valley of the shadow. I literally, and some people everybody has their own valley, got it, you have your own valley, but where you are in a valley, and it's, the shadow of death is over you.
Yeah, you get real close to God. So I um, that's my, they're my favorite Bible verse man Um cause, I lived it like you said. But uh, when you're down like that and you only can look up and I maintained I didn't play, I didn't play around with God, I didn't play with God, I didn't play, I maintained my faith got stronger and that's how I, that's how I made it out. So I credit the military and war Nobody probably ever said to this but I credit all the bad stuff I went through with giving me a stronger relationship with God. I really do. I really do Because if nothing focuses you more than a bomb coming in, you know a mortar round coming in. You you're laser focused, right and you're, you're going to pray to God, Allah, you're going to pray to somebody, you're going to pray to Buddha, whoever. Hey, let me hit them all up. See which one called me. But, yeah, I'm a Christian Right.
Right.
I've seen it all. Uh, I've seen guys. We had guys who converted to Islam over there. You know, when we were in Saudi Arabia together, a couple of them cats converted to Islam, thinking that was a problem. They're going to go help them, I don't know. But, um, yeah, man, that was it. That's two things. I retired and I still have friends now. I got to wait to call them and then when I do call them, they're like hey, bro, you're retired, we're not retired. Oh yes, my bad, my bad, my bad.
Let me ask you this man and I know that this is in a line with what you just said. My question is this man, and you would be helping me a lot because I'm I'm in seminary and I'm working on a doctorate. Okay, and the topic of my paper that I have to write at the end of this thing is going to be centered around why combat has a tendency to either strengthen a veteran's faith or make them question it.
So what is your take on that? I know I don't want to get you off guard, but I'm just curious about that, since you spoke on that.
Yeah, I, I, you're right, that's a good, that's a good topic and for someone who has not had a foundation in in the church, I can understand why it would pull them further away. But everyone I know who had the foundation it, like I said it, laser focuses you because in states we have all of these distractions. But when you are, everything's a distraction at TV, got other people you know, driving some places to go, people, what stuff to do but when you're in combat and you're, all those distractions are taken away from you. You just, it's just you, and sometimes it's just you just listen to your own thoughts and you'll have the question, you'll have a job questions and Jesus even question why.
You know, can you take this cup for me? Uh, joe was like you know, what did I? What did I do? Right, deserve all this, but, but not my will, but your will.
So your foundation is very important to that. That's the key, the foundation Now for the ones who? And that your foundation, because you are allowing your light to shine. And then you were in the same foxhole, figuratively, as a nonbeliever. When he sees your light shining and you praising God and giving him thanks for the little things he like, hey, we're in the same foxhole and this guy is praising God and, and I'm over here questioning God, let me find out about this God thing, let me you know. And I've had people, I've had people question that hey, how can your faith be so strong? Because I'm looking at where he brought me from. He said, oh, we got you in war, yeah, but we're not dead yet, right? You, we both know somebody. You know I'm talking to this guy. We both know somebody who was here yesterday and we're, he ain't here, no more. So that's something to be thankful for, that's something to praise God for.
So you know, our church grew tremendously, you know, and every deployment, except the first one I did not go to church for the first Gulf War because I knew better than to play with God. Right, I don't know if you remember this, but we had a church on our compound and it was full. It was standing room. Only they were standing out the door when the scud missiles was falling. But when it was said that we had won and it was over, that chaplain assistant every Sunday after that was the only one in there sweeping dust off the floor. I used to walk by that church on Sunday, the little space, and seeing him in there sweeping the dust on Sunday. But during the bombs falling, people were standing. It was coming on our compound from other compounds because we had the closest church and I. But every deployment after that, oh yeah, I was the first one in there, I was in there and I played a drum. So I was always a drummer and with that choir and stuff like that, yeah, that's it, man.
It laser focuses you when you are, when your foundation is in God, and by you being laser focused you shine a little brighter and that person that don't know God or who is questioning God, they have to come up and ask you hey man, what's going on? Hey man, how are you this way? And I am, I have been this way my entire life. So people are all man, you need to be a comedian? I think no, I couldn't. I know I don't think I'm funny, I really don't. I be serious and people like be laughing. I'm like that's not funny. Not funny to me, but you know it's serious. Like my mom bust me in my mouth. That wasn't funny to me, that apparently that's a funny story, but it wasn't funny to me, not at the time.
But yeah, it's hilarious, it's hilarious. I'm just saying.
But yeah, that's what it is. You laser focus. It focuses you because he takes all the distractions away. So now you have life through him, death through bombs. Give them your own two choices. Right, I had a mortar round. I was in a building and laying down and I heard the mortar rounds Right, go over my head and land 30, 40 yards away and it was a dud. And I was in the special forces and every base, every major base, when you deploy, there's always a special forces compound inside the major, the big base. So I'm in the special forces compound chilling. That thing hit. It was a dud. We all went over there and looked. We was like, oh man, I'm literally sticking in the ground like the coyote, wiley Coyote and Rollerunner sticking the ground and it's a dud. I'm like, phew, that's God. Yeah, that's God right there and I've been able to recognize him and hear his voice more. And that's it. That'll help. That's definitely. You got a good paper, you write a good paper. That's a good paper.
Well, it's first. Thank you for sharing. Let me just add this on top, or ask this on top Is it me or is it that when you have a near death experience I'm talking about the whole life flash before your eyes experience the one that I don't even have to go into detail about because you know what I'm talking about? Is it me or does everyone who go through that have a tendency to afterwards just be not so afraid of stuff? Like I'm numb, and I'll just say that there are some who have expressed concern to me because there are situations that I found myself in where everyone is like you ought to be afraid and I just am not.
You know what I mean, like, it's just not there. What that is and I found that I figured this out is that is, our faith is stronger than our fear.
Mm right on.
So I jumped out of airplanes. You know people are like, oh my God, I can't even jump off a chair. It's not scary, it's really not. When you had one of those, I had a couple See the first one, you know, boom, but I've had a couple. When you come through that and your faith gets stronger and I'm like man, come on. First of all, no weapon formula gets me a prosper which I prosper. I believe that I live that. Secondly, you had a near death and I can only equate it to that was God protecting us. So when you know in your bones that God is going to protect you, I've had the same conversation with people that say, man, you're not scared of this, I'm not scared of snakes. You can't come up behind me and say boo and I get scared. No, really.
Right.
And then, when you know that, you know that you know where you going when you die.
Mm-hmm right on.
You know that you always hit that. I tell people. When you go to church, you always hit a. They say and when they do the call to worship, do you know that? You know that? You know, yeah, yeah, I do.
Right on.
After that and knowing that you're right, people in this society says you ought to be afraid and if you're not, that means you're psychotic or psych. You know you got a death wish, and no, I just know that God I serve as bigger than the fear that you have.
So it's just it is what it is and I'm me. It is what it is, right God. I serve as bigger than your fear. So you be scared of that. I'm not. I'm not scared of snakes, I'm not. I have respect for animals who don't come in my living room. I don't go in their living room.
Right.
And I don't want them to come in my living room Got you. So I have a respect, for I'm not scared of it. I have respect for it. Hey, you stay in your woods, I stay in my living room, too easy.
Okay, right on. I appreciate that, looking back to the day you retired to the day you left the military what advice would you give your younger self about how society will treat you as a Christian veteran of color?
Oh, I would definitely say maintain your faith, maintain your faith. It's easy to be distracted. I was distracted. We all get that way. We nobody's perfect, we're not going to be. We strive for perfection, but we're we're saying every day maintain your faith, maintain your, your cool. I got out of the military I was very angry, very angry, angry, angry, angry, angry, angry. Simply because what people were saying was hard and my eyes wasn't hard or difficult. I'm like what are you? What are you complaining for? I was like oh, the boss and the job. I said let me explain something to you. When something gets hard, let me tell you how. You know something's hard. If you have to put this tire on this car, you don't get a flat tire and you got to put the tire on Right. That might seem hard, I said, but if you're getting shot at while you have to put this tire on, then that's hard.
Right this right here, this ain't hard. I was angry. I was an angry dude. I got my concealed carry permit, you know, and I'm carrying my gun every day and I got my ungrateful wretches of children doing what they do. And I got boys, you know. I got one. I got like five boys and a girl and I'm like the knuckleheads, just I'm like really, oh so. And then I have one of my sons, I don't know, he wants to be gangster or something. I said, bro, I'm more of a gangster than you are, cut it out, cut it out, cut it out. So yeah, man, I would definitely tell myself that.
Also. I've had an experience where I was going for my colonoscopy and I have a cousin who was in in the medical field and he told me what to say, to demand it. And I go to my doc and they sent me through all the tests the blood tests, the stool sample test, and everything's coming back good. And I was like no, no, no, doc, you know as well as I do that African-American males present different than and he didn't let me finish the sentence. He said you're absolutely correct. Did the colonoscopy, they found a polyp and I was like it was all good, come back a year later for the cause.
Once you get a colonoscopy, you have to come back a year later for a followup. They did another one, found another polyp, took that out, and then they had the audacity to tell me they'll see me in seven years. I say, oh, the devil is a lie. You're going to see me next year. What are you talking about? It's two years in a row. You found polyps. Why would I come back in seven years? No, next year I'll be back October, I'll be right here, I'll be right up in there, but I believe that the doctors already know this information. So when one of us comes in front of them, that should be the key to not try to push the narrative over all your tests come back, you're good. So I believe that that was a situation that I faced.
What do you think that is though?
I don't know. I think they are counting on the fact that we don't know. Knowledge is so important, education is so important and sometimes we have to be our own advocate. But I really believe that people of color and I did more inquiries about it they saying because African-American males don't go to these tests, these trials, we don't volunteer that's what they were saying Because we need more African-American males to volunteer so we can have a better range to go by. I said but if y'all already know this and I come in here wanting it, why y'all? Is it because I'm black? I'd be blunt, but I really think it's just less work and more money. So, doctors', medicine today doesn't cure us. You have to really fight. I would tell myself too keep praying, keep your faith, keep praying, keep your eyes open Things have changed.
Things have definitely changed from when you were first coming in. They teach you to keep your head on the swivel, be aware of your surroundings, that kind of thing.
So yeah, have you ever experienced a challenge from either non-veterans, non-christians, non or people of color because of you being either specifically a Christian or a person of color, or a veteran even as have you ever experienced a challenge for any one of those reasons?
My colonoscopy one that was one going to the VA, because I'm fully VA, I don't have an outside of insurance. I have experienced that well. I automatically assumed that the people working at the VA were veterans, okay, or they were veteran friendly. But I have experienced more so than not. The people either jealousy like jealous or they act like it's their money for some reason is weird and I'm like what's going on?
Because I was a person who was blessed to get 100% out the gate. Okay, first time. Go out the gate, okay, and I did everything I was taught to do, okay, and that's what happened. I have definitely seen it happen and they have attitudes and you're like, hey, you chose this job. I didn't choose this job for you. The least you could do is be happy that you're at work. You didn't pay, good Christ, right. And then when I was going through things, they just act like it's their money. They didn't really do. This is not your money. Release it, release the funds, do something. That's been my biggest at the VA. The VA is really rough because they're old vets or there's somebody who did a year and a half and got out or got put out, basically, and then when you come in and you have experienced difficulty to the point to where I had to contact the patient advocate and get them involved- Okay.
And I'm like, ooh, but nothing as far as being a Christian. No, it's been more curiosity, I actually, from when we were together in the military, we kind of some of the cats that we knew, we kind of forced ourselves out of profanity.
Okay.
My plan. My plan the cuss word game. Because if you say a cuss word, everybody is playing. They get to hit you anywhere below the neck until you say the keyword in his cuss word. You have to say the word cuss word. So we had some really big muscle bound dudes and that the fear of getting hit in the arm, on the chest, it really made us stop cussing. So that was not a Christian thing, you know, but we saw that we needed to stop doing that. So people come around me and people always say you know, I get it all the time. You're different. I come into a room, people just change my family members. They stop cussing, they put the beer down. You know, and I didn't know what that was. I was like what is going on? When I walk into a room, people change and they say something about you. And now I know what it is. But I didn't know what it was at first.
But yeah, okay, I think that's a blessing man. I mean, even though it's irritating to go through, I'm cool with it now.
I mean, I know what it is. So now my circle is different, you know. But I can. I'm a person who can go in any circle and go anywhere with the hang, with the best of them. You know, chill out, sports, church, you know, I don't. I'm not changing. They change around me. So I know what that is. That's apparently. I was told that that was my light. I was like, hey, whatever, right on, right on.
And then people apologize oh, I'm sorry, I'm not the pastor. What you doing? You got to apologize to me. I'm being you, you know be you.
That's cool man, I think no, it's a blessing in that you know when you say that you've not had issues with specific to religion that in and of itself is a blessing, because I can tell you I have really and it has come from those who look like me the most Given that I am a minister. When I became a minister, or on my way to becoming a minister, it just seemed like the hate came even harder. You know, that's how the enemy works. I get it.
That's exactly how I'm about to say that yeah, I get it Exactly.
But it's unfortunate that he uses those that he does and some of the hate that I got both from people who've known me a while and haven't known me a while, Right, Right, those who knew me a while. Some are mostly everybody's surprised. That's the first thing. Let me just say that's the first thing. You know that. And the further back we go, the more surprised it is.
Let me just say that, yeah, when I tell people, yeah, I tell people I'm like you know Rico, you know Rico, preach it right, Because, like the silver minister, Right.
Yeah, I'm like the silver came to my initial sermon, man. Yeah.
He told me. He told me he did. He sure did. He told me. I just talked to him the other day. Okay, yeah, man, them cats is them cats.
And it's funny because when I saw him near first of all it was during COVID, so we had masks on Well I was preaching so I didn't have a mask on. He's down in the front and he walked up and I didn't recognize, you know mask. I didn't know what it was Right After I was done, people would congratulate me and shake my hand.
That joke will pull that mask off and I saw I was like first of all I'd already known he was a minister, but to see him in that you know again, it was one of those life flash before your eyes, moments like as surprises as you might be about me, brother, let me tell you I'm proud of you, but you talking about surprise.
Yes sir, yes sir.
You talking about surprise, I was like, oh yeah, okay, brother, I feel you, I see you. I was so happy to see you, man, so I can imagine the level of surprise that people are feeling. Not only surprise, but there's a twinge of confusion, like huh, like like for real, you know.
But anyway.
So so no, it's a blessing man. If you've never experienced that man and I pray that you don't, because there are some I'll say just keep this in your back pocket. There's some very learned and intelligent sounding brothers out there that will say some things that will definitely make you question if you're on the right path and if, like you said, you are not grounded in your faith, you are apt to go to the edge of that thing and you might fall over. You know, because they are very intelligent sounding. But once you you stick to your faith and you know the word, then it's easy. It's like whatever. But anyway, that's just my soapbox thing.
Okay.
So the one thing, what is the one thing that people get wrong about you the most?
That I am. I don't know what. It was soft or not tough, or I don't come across as a tough guy. You know I'm still over 225, you know I'm a big. I ain't no little dude, no more. But I think that to me that was the thing Everybody was like like. You know how that saying is. Don't mistake my kindness for weakness. That's been the biggest thing that I've had to experience, because I'm a jovial guy. You know there's I ain't chest bumping people and stuff like that. But you know you get my timing wrong. We might have to go take it to the grass. You know I'm like, but I'm not not, no more, I'm too old for that. Not any bad knees.
Right.
But because I don't carry myself like the tough guy. That don't mean I can't defend myself and won't. But that's the thing I've had in the military and out I've had a few people try. You know they always try. They try you and see what you made of and all that kind of stuff.
But I never came up. But you know, just like bruh, it's not going to go how you think, and that's all I have to say. It's not going to go how you think it's rectified. So I had, as a matter of fact, it was one minister and he was like you better be glad, I'm safe. I said, well, at this moment I'm just as safe as you are, sir, so whatever, whatever. And he backed down and but yeah, that's it.
I'm not.
I'm an open book man. I'm an open book.
That is. That is so. That's interesting. Because it's interesting you say that again. When I think back 30, some odd years, one of the things I think about is that you know, we had a motley crew. I mean, there was people from all types of different backgrounds and whatnot, but then you had some just like you do in any crew man, any, any group who wore their toughness on their shoulder right.
They okay, that's probably somebody who you don't want to tussle with. Then there was some who I don't know if you tough, but I know you crazy. So I don't want to. I don't want to, you know.
I ain't trying to go there with you either.
But then what makes me think about this is, yeah, you always been. You know you you describe it as Joe view. I think, again, you, you always had a light about you. That was that made people gravitate towards you. But I recall a time I don't know where we were, I don't know if we were back in the States, maybe still overseas, saudi. I just remember that there was this phase, that that you guys were going through and I say you guys, cause I certainly wasn't a part of this, but there was this weight room phase that you remember that.
Yeah, Like it spilled over. It spilled over from Saudi. It spilled over from Saudi. Okay.
So that was, and I just remember there was this there's this weight room phase and Cass was walking around with these weight belts on, like you were. I couldn't tell if you were going to the gym and just came back from the living, so, but the point and all that is that you guys hit this phase where serious weights were being thrown around. It wasn't like y'all were, y'all weren't playing with these things. No, sir.
And and some serious weights was being thrown around and I was like, okay, you know I'm not, I've never been a weight dude, but I ain't trying to lock up with none of these cats Cause, cause you know, y'all cast was like bench, pressing like like, like, like like two and three of me right. Like I was like oh okay, y'all got serious, you know.
I'm going to let y'all have it. It was ready. Yeah, we were ready. It was crazy, we were sick, we were angry, we were angry then. We were angry? Uh, we were. We weren't just throwing weights around, we were throwing things around with, with a gunpowder, and and, and we had all of that. It was, it was a no doubt, no doubt. We were angry and we had little weights like crazy at the end of Saudi.
Okay.
And we wanted to come back and you know we was still trying to keep it going. That basically what it was. I looked totally different from when I left to go to Saudi to when we came back. We was, oh, no doubt.
No doubt Huge, we were huge.
I came home and everybody was like wow.
Yeah, Must be the jail Like just got out, yeah. Yeah, no, I mean, bro, I remember that, and not only you know the weight thing, but also some things I might have been carrying, and I remember that kind of being my introduction to carrying things.
Right.
I just oh, oh, that's, that's what we do.
Oh, okay.
So it was, it was, it was my introduction to that. I just remember you kind of, almost kind of, be that way. In them mean streets of Columbus.
Yeah.
Right cause that was a wild place. I mean at that time, at that time and they were prejudice against soldiers. Yeah.
Yeah, because they accused us of always taking their friends from taking taking their toys.
Right.
And it was like we can't take nothing that comes.
Right, yeah, yeah, that's a whole yeah.
So the other thing, remember we used to have to have the post sticker you supposed to have it on your car and it had the month and the date.
Yeah.
We had to put those on metal plates, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, Stick it in your windshield up at the dash and what a windshield meets.
And then when you went to park somewhere you had to flip that thing over because when the local Yocles would know you were from base, they would. They would damage your car. We had plenty of people that had that happen to you. I don't know if you knew that or not, but yeah, we all had to have a little metal plate. You put your sticker on it and then you just flipped it over. When you went on post and when you went off post you had to flip that thing over. It was it was crazy At least where we used to hang out. How about that? We're going to say that? You're going to say that?
you had to put the decal on the metal place.
Yes, what was the when you let? When you went off post, you had to flip the plate over so nobody didn't know your car was from on post. It was crazy. Like I said, maybe that was just what we used to hang out at, I don't know. We had to do it or your car would get vandalized.
Wow, may God help me. Y'all had some fancy cars.
you know like y'all this is true.
Y'all drove, y'all drove some fancy cars, I mean.
I had to BMW with all that music. Yeah, yeah.
The seven series joint. I'll never forget that man I was like I'm putting around in my little Ford S-Sport, yeah, y'all cast me playing putting those fancy cars. So, okay, well, you know, fun times though. Fun times, definitely. So, coming to the end of this, is there anything you wish I would have asked? And if so, what do you wish I would have asked, and how would you answer it?
I guess, how was your transition out of the military Mentally, spiritually, what did you go through and how did you come on the other side? And for me personally, the military has changed their role. So I've been out for seven years now. So about nine years ago the military changed their role and started getting to behavioral health, starting to really focus on it Because of people coming back PTSD or whatever they weren't calling it that, but it's stuff like that. So right before you get out now you have to go see a psychiatrist or a psychologist and they expand the chaplain and they explain to you these are some of the things that you're going to be experiencing and some coping mechanisms. And then, when you get out, you have to go see a psychiatrist or a psychologist for a couple of sessions when you get out.
So they want to ensure that your transition was smooth and hey, once again, these are some of the things that you're going to be experiencing out here in civilian world. So I was so thankful that I had that training, because when I was experiencing it, I knew what it was. I can't even imagine going through that and not knowing what it was.
Because, like I said, I was really angry for people who were complaining about stuff they shouldn't be complaining about. And then your family dynamic changes. I was working 18-hour days sometimes and then mom is the boss, and then you get out. Now you come in like Godzilla in the city kicking over stuff and they're like, hey, you can't do that. So I had the training to come out. Now I don't know people. Now it's an option too to do the training, and some people just want to get out.
You can just sign off on stuff. When you're a certain rank, when you're an officer or senior in listed, you can just sign stuff off, and I ain't going through that. But I'm so glad I did that because it really helped me transition. So I'm currently they switched to calling it the whole health coach.
This is.
Zoom once a month. The Army, the Army, the VA pulled back in a lot of the stuff that they were sending people out for Acupuncture chiropractor. They pulled it all back into the VA. They put this whole health coach so you go to one person and he can help you with anything mental or physical or like that. So that really helps too, talking in groups and stuff like that. But yeah, that definitely you can ask that question. And then getting back with the church for me finding a church, should I say, and I have, and that has definitely helped Definitely helped.
Oh, that's awesome man. I wish that was around when I got out, Right. You see, you see what.
I'm saying, yeah, it took so long for them to do it. I'm glad they're doing it, but it just took them so long to understand that, hey, this is a need. What is this? I'm going through, right, and I'm just telling you what to do, what to go, what to be, all that, and then you get out of your, you're left to your own devices. Some people can't handle it. They go back in. I equate it to the same thing of what people get out of prison. You've been institutionalized. I literally was institutionalized.
Right.
You know but and then you get out, and now you got all this free time and people can plan it and they can talk back to you. You know he's like oh wait a minute. You can't take somebody 20 or something years and nobody, nobody can. You can't even bat your eyes, suck your teeth, and now you got some little whippersnapper. You're right. You know talking trash. You're like oh right, right.
That's different. No, that's, that's. That is so. That is a valid point. And the point you make about having to deal with it on your own and you got to figure, man, I got out a long time ago.
Yeah.
I was one of those to do your four and I did more than four, but you know right around that time I got out not knowing stuff and not knowing why certain things were impacted. Actually, I thought it was normal, let me just put it that way. I thought I thought everybody thought like this I thought everybody yeah, you mean to tell me not everybody checks the doors at night. Y'all don't do that, y'all don't, y'all don't go around, and you know check the doors and all of that.
Y'all don't do stay in two in the morning.
You know whatever I mean, it's not all of that, not sitting with your back to the door and the restaurant. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I thought that was just normal man, but you know, so it's good. And I think another thing that I think the VA or the Army or the military period recognize but I don't think there's anything they can do about is unfortunately there's more demand than there is supply and they are they are continuously manufacturing more need, right.
I mean, with every deployment and conflict around the world, there are more and more people that they are creating that need VA services. Right, but the VA services are overwhelmed, but you just keep dumping more and more people that need it and you're making them every day.
Right, you're constantly making more, and I'm talking about from the day you, you, you put people in basic training. You just made a couple. Yeah, you know what I mean. So it's like so this is an endless cycle and, like I said, I think they're aware of it, but unfortunately they make it so difficult, given the fact that you created these individuals with these issues, why you make it so hard for them to get compensated for you know what I mean.
It's like but it's been a struggle.
Right, right, and it shouldn't be. It shouldn't be.
Teachers and military. We should be the highest paid people in the country Teachers and military.
Well, and you, you know, it's so good to hear that you were able to get yours out the gate. Yes, it took me. It took me years to get there.
And with our groups and everything we're helping. Definitely, that's my, that's a pet, I mean one of my pet projects. Hey, get your health in check. And why aren't you a hundred percent? What's going on? Right, because we got cats that we know didn't even file until a year ago. Right, right, they was like oh, I didn't know I could. He's like wow, because when y'all got out, they weren't doing nothing like they're doing. When I got out.
Absolutely not, absolutely not.
And it's sad. It was offered but it was on a piece of paper and you had to check a box. It was really small, writing Right, because right after right I didn't, I reenlisted but I didn't tell them I did it. So I went through the transition process at Fort Bennett. So I just want to see and I actually I just want to get out of work. So so I went through all that stuff and, sure enough, in these small little boxes you had to check if you wanted more information. Oh wow, and if you didn't check that box, they didn't. They didn't contact you. But now you have to go through all of this. There was two weeks of classes, resume, how to dress for a job, you know, and all that stuff in psychological stuff and how to do your budget. When you get out you ain't gonna have BAH, no more, and BAQ, you ain't gonna have all that. So right, they don't know a far better job now to transitioning soldiers, but they need to build more VA's.
That's what they do. They need it. Yeah, absolutely right, man. I could go on for days by that. So we're at the end. Last thing I want to ask you is just your, your your thought on some current events, and the one that's really big right now. Is this ban on TikTok Just gonna toss that out there? What are your thoughts on that?
It's scary. Everybody they're thinking that the Chinese are using TikTok to spy on us. It's. It hits home with me because I have a niece who is a super influencer. She has multiple, double digit million followers. So when you, when you get that high, you can command five to $10,000 per gig. So, like a dentist in Miami wanted her to do like a commercial about his dentistry, okay, five G's, just like that, and this is she, commands that. Now she's, she's done so much stuff and when they take that from her or or whatever they're going to do, I'm afraid for her because now society is raising those children to influence it as a job. That's not no job, cause it can go just like that. The internet shut off tomorrow, right.
You don't have no job. You know, she, like I said, she's considered a super influencer and and TikTok is just one of her things and I think it's. I think it's sad. I saw a documentary on TikTok in China. They, they, they highlight education and those kids doing stuff for the, for the community, and if you are doing some for the country and science and you know all that STEM stuff and over here they highlight the stupid stuff. Right, and it's, it's crazy, it is sad and yeah, I think it's sad, sad, sad, sad that they let it get this far and now they're going to pull the plug. And there's some people that's their livelihood, they talk it. You know that's their livelihood.
You know, I'd say this man. My thoughts on it are are compound. One on the one hand, I think that China is smart playing the. They play in the long game, right, if, if they can win over the hearts and minds of the younger generation, then in a couple of generations they're not going to have to worry about this place anymore. Correct, that's. That's the long game. They're smart in doing that, however.
So so from that perspective, I get it. I see why you want to ban it. However, to me, it's kind of hypocritical to want to ban TikTok, because TikTok is nothing more than a tool. And you want to ban the tool when it comes to social media, but you want to fight tooth and nail when it comes to assault weapons, right. Right, because one will kill you now, one will kill you later, right, depending on how the tool is used. And so you're focusing on the tool and not focusing on the bigger issue, like, what is it that makes the person want to use that tool in that way? Exactly? Focus on that. And again, don't get me wrong, I'm not this two-way gun rights nut. I'm not none of that. I'm speaking logically. I don't have an emotion.
You're making a lot of sense.
Yeah, I don't have an emotional tie either way. I got a couple things and if somebody said they're banned I might be like whatever, I'm not pressed about it, I just want my money back. I spend a little change on it. But I'm not like pride from my I'm not all out of pride from my cold dead hands and all that. I'm not that dude. But at the same time you want to take it and I'm responsible with it.
So that's kind of you know why don't you focus on what makes people irresponsible with certain things? There you go, and you mentioned that Yannice is a super influencer and I think that's cool. I think that the thing is it's supply and demand. There's obviously a demand for what she supplies right. To the tune of multiple million of people who want it. Now, is that a good thing? Is it a bad thing? I don't know if it's good or bad, I just know that it is what it is, and she found a way to make it.
Yep, Now, one good thing about her is her parents. She graduated college, so that's one good thing. And if all parents are ensuring that their kids finish school or some get something that if this don't work, you know they got something to fall back on, do it. I also believe they should make China change the algorithm to what they use in China, so then that would that would take all that stupid stuff off a TikTok and they would only support the same stuff over there.
People would be so mad. Where's my stupidity? Where's my ratcheting this?
They'll just find another, something else. Where's my ratcheting this.
You want to show me all this science, or?
whatever.
But no, I get it.
That's a way to make it dwindle down and populate her too. Say hey, y'all, y'all, change your algorithm to what you have it in China. Let's start highlighting some of these kids who are this high education. Let's highlight, you know, their brain instead of their butts, you know.
You got to keep in mind, though, with China and the things they highlight, they it's more than just simply highlighting the positive. They're also taking away free speech. So, from that perspective, that would make us know better than them, in terms of our free society, to be able to say and do you know certain things without you?
could still be able to say that they just wouldn't make it part of the algorithm to pop up on your TikTok when you first pop open. You know, that's all we wouldn't. They wouldn't have to change. It would just wouldn't be what's popular and what's being what people are getting paid for. Oh, I get it, she was she was doing some stuff that I mean, her father was like, yeah, I can't. I had to take her off. I said, well, I can't watch this.
Ooh not my niece, you know like ooh Right, and I guess what I'm saying is that, yeah, they could change the algorithm, but when you get to the point where you're, you're banning free speech and you're you're telling somebody. You know it's no different than what's the book bans right, you can't have certain books and libraries.
Once you get to that point, that's a, that's a whole and unfortunately we're that way in Florida down here Good gracious man man. I can't even, I can't even apologize. Enough, you from Florida? I just shake my head. Yeah, yeah, I know. Yeah, that's what we're going to hope. We're going to get out here and vote, you know.
Yeah. I don't do a you don't do black history month, do you yeah?
We got a little, a little sprinkling.
Y'all celebrate that. You know, we got a little, we got a little, you know exactly, yeah, so I feel, you man, I feel you man and I'm more proud to you, brother Bless, you you live down there and you you make it, and we we, we try and we're, we stick in our flag, you know, like with a light at the top, you know in a dark, dark place.
But yeah, we, we trying it.
No, but you know, that's a, that's a. That's a prime example of you know what I'm saying about supply and demand. In other words, there is enough of you guys. I say you guys. Let me just clarify about what I mean. There are enough level headed people, I think, in Florida who if they would only get involved, that would be able to to shift the narrative and take control, take better control, or at least inject themselves to the extent that the, the state government would be more balanced than it is.
I just think that there's just not enough level headed people getting involved in the process.
Right, They've. They've convinced people that their vote doesn't matter.
Right.
And I have to tell people all the time, if your vote didn't matter, they wouldn't work so hard at stopping you from voting. Yeah, there you go it means it matters, and if you don't vote, you do vote. Yeah, you can't have a conversation with me about politics if you haven't voted. That's the first question I asked. Hey, did you vote? Okay, we'll keep moving. Let's talk about sports or something else, but you didn't vote. What are we talking about?
And because there's not enough people involved. As a result, we we up here in Atlanta, we clown y'all.
Yes, yes, and the clowning commits.
Oh wow, listen man. I thoroughly enjoyed this bed. You got to come back, man.
You got to. You got to? Oh, of course, definitely Anytime.
Yeah, we're. So I just just to put it out here. I'm going to be doing a series some folks that are not so much question based but just sort of a hang out, chop it up session. Okay Cool, you can just come out and just talk and and, and. Sometimes we can even do. We can even do round table. So if you want to get some of the other fellas from back in, the day they might want to join in and we just chop it up, you know some ground rule, you know the ground rules, definitely, definitely.
So some ground rules in place.
You know, some of them are going to have to be, some of them are going to have to be told a bunch. Yeah, we not going to not going to incriminate Some of them. Cats were police officers, Are you like really? Yeah.
Yeah, that's, that's a whole nother. So we're going to, we're going to have, we're going to be doing that in the near future. So just keep that in mind.
but I would love to have you back, man, anytime, anytime, bro, anytime.
They're very enlightening, but I really appreciate you. So, before we bounce, is there anything on your mind, anything you want to close with, anything you want to say? Questions concerns comments.
Man, for the, for the listeners. Wow, this has been an amazing opportunity. I'm so glad we connected. I guess no, stay prayed up. Tomorrow is not promised. People are leaving here every day. Stay prayed up, get closer to God. Yes, sir, yes sir, that's it. That's what I'm going to leave with right there.
Okay, we'll write on that. Thank you again so much, and with that said, we'll go ahead and close out. May God keep you, may God bless you and may God continue to be with you. Thank you, brother. I appreciate you, man. Thank you.
